ANZAC:  Australian and New Zealand Army Corps

Today is ANZAC Day.  April 25th.  Today is the day we remember our fallen soldiers and thank those who have returned from serving or are currently serving our country.

Today I feel ungrateful.  My life has been sheltered and peaceful.  I don’t know the horrors and anxiety that come with having  been in a warzone nor witnessed the atrocities that people are capable of.  I’m a coward.  Or at least I feel like one.

I am not ungrateful though.  I really do appreciate those people, some of them family, others friends, who have served in the armed forces.  In whatever capacity.  You stepped up and did what you could for peace in this world.  My peace.  My freedom.  So, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Most days I go about my life, ignorant of the fact that there are currently many conflicts waging across the planet.  Not because I don’t care, I do, but because it’s not a part of my everyday life and never has been.  Yes I do deliberately avoid the news, it’s sad and depressing most of the time.  Part of the reason for this is self-preservation.  Preserving a certain amount of mental sanity.  Why drive myself into a state of distress over a situation that I as an individual cannot fix?  I feel like I can serve others best by supporting those closest to me on a person-by-person basis and being as kind and caring as possible to everyone I come in contact with.  Treat others as I wish to be treated.

There are many individuals within my group of family and friends, some I know of, others I don’t, that suffer any or all of the following conditions:  anxiety, depression & PTSD (and many other related afflictions I’m sure).  Not all of these people have served in the forces, most are everyday citizens like myself.  But regardless of how these conditions took root within the psyche of each person, I feel I can best help and support them by not joining their ranks if at all possible.  Not watching the news is a part of my defence system.  Avoiding conflict over politics, religion and money are others.  There’s enough anger in this world without me being apart of it.

Now, I know a lot of folk who may think I’m a bit cold and abrasive when discussing a sensitive topic like mental health.  That I appear not to take the emotional side onboard.  I do, but I do so at arms length.  I’m aware that I do this.  Some of the reason is because I don’t know what to say or how to say it, nor do I wish to offend or upset anyone.  I don’t want to look or sound like I KNOW what you are feeling because quite simply I don’t.  What I do want, is to UNDERSTAND as best I can and how I might best support you.

So here is what I really wanted to say today, please, please know, that if you have served your country and especially mine, Australia, and afforded me my freedom to live my life in peace and quiet (often misconstrued as ignorance), thank you.  I am ever so grateful and not ignorant at all, but as little as most people discuss their experiences at war, I too rarely discuss my experiences in peace.  And I like to think I do so out of respect.  I don’t want to rub salt in any wounds.

Admittedly I could do with remembering those that suffered and continue to suffer, more often than I do.  I won’t deny that.  So, please, if you wish to help remind me of how I am able to live with my freedoms, both physical and mental, then hit me up.  Or if you just fancy a chat, some company and a cuppa, give me a shout.

Anyone who knows me well, knows my tea drinking habits and let’s face it, my kettle is always on!  My door is mostly open whilst I’m at home and on the hunt for a job (that’s a blog for another day right there), so come on over and let’s have a cuppa and maybe if you’re lucky, a piece of cake if I’ve been cooking (advance notice required for gluten or dairy free).